8 really weird things that happened at Rio 2016
Strange moments on and off the field
By Brandon Hicks, CBC Sports
Considering how bad the leadup to the Rio Olympics was, which was almost unprecedented in its calamity, the actual Games themselves have gone fairly smooth.
But that isn't to say there weren't a few odd things to see over the past two weeks.
Here are the weirdest moments of the 2016 Olympics, ranked in order to foster debate and heavy name-calling:
8. Caught with his pants down
Ticket scalping was a big issue before the Olympics began, and Rio police were cracking down on it hard when the Games actually started. This was bad news for one Patrick Hickey, 71, who was involved in a scalping ring. And also happens to be Europe's top Olympic official.
Even though you don't see a high-ranking IOC member arrested during the actual Olympics too often, this alone doesn't necessarily make this item worthy of being on this list.
Since he was arrested stark naked, with corresponding video footage, it does.
7. Giving the shirt off his back (in protest)
Have you ever been so angry that you wanted to take all of your clothes off in protest? No? Well then you don't have this in common with two Mongolian wrestling coaches, who were so angry after a last-second penalty caused their athlete to lose a bronze medal that they decided to do something about it.
That something was taking their clothes off on the wrestling mat, laying them in a pile, and sitting down.
Mongolian wrestling coaches strip-down in protest, need to be escorted by police <a href="https://t.co/OjnjjM99qI">https://t.co/OjnjjM99qI</a> <a href="https://t.co/b7HIAdqsAb">pic.twitter.com/b7HIAdqsAb</a>—@CBCOlympics
None of this helped their cause.
6. Unsynchronized diving/roommates
When is it OK to force a roommate to find another place to sleep because you are looking to spend some intimate time with another person? Answer: When you have an agreement in place that addresses this beforehand.
When is it not OK to force a roommate to find another place to sleep:
- When you don't have an agreement in place that addresses this beforehand
- When you are synchronized diving teammates sharing a room
- When you are at the actual Olympics you're competing at
- When you are competing in said diving event the next morning
Brazil's Ingrid Oliveira (who slept in the room) and Giovanna Pedroso (who was kicked out) placed eighth in the 10m synchronized diving event, and split as teammates shortly after.
In case you were wondering, yes, it was dubbed the "Sex Marathon" by media. Other titles that weren't in the running but probably should have been were "Sexlympics" and "Canoedeling," since the person Oliveira was spending time with was canoe/kayak specialist Pedro da Silva. He finished sixth in his event, if you're keeping score.
5. Hard to stomach
When questioned under pressure, everyone will admit to having at least a close call. Feeling queasy, ate something that they didn't agree with, sudden nausea, extreme nerves, whatever it was, the main problem was the lack of access to facilities that provide relief. That's when the terror starts. That's when you wonder if you're going to make it, or if you'll have an embarrassing mess to clean up.
Usually, this happens in solitude, or among very few people. Usually, if the worst happens, you can be discreet, maybe spray some bad cologne to hide what happened.
Usually, this doesn't happen during the Olympics, with millions watching, while you're leading a race. Which is what happened to Yohann Diniz.
(I'm not embedding video for obvious reasons, so click here to see what happened)
Give Diniz as much credit as you possibly can here. Most people would call it a day after that happened. He pushed through that, and a subsequent collapse, to finish eighth.
4. Up and (not) over
This is, indeed, a wondrous age we live in. An age of information. An age of instant communication. An age when an athlete has to answer serious questions about whether his Olympic dreams were dashed because his unfortunately-positioned genitals.
ICYMI: This pole vaulter's penis caused him some big problems at <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/Rio2016?src=hash">#Rio2016</a> <a href="https://t.co/4fZKnPKTMR">https://t.co/4fZKnPKTMR</a>—@nypost
Japanese pole vaulter, Hiroki Ogita, insisted that it was his leg and his arm that actually caused the bar to fall over.
3. Speaking from the heart
And now, a few quotes from Rio spokesman Mario Andrada:
- On robberies — "I think that when you said several at gunpoint, we didn't have several reports at gunpoint, we had some."
- On low attendance at some events — "Numbers mislead."
- On the green diving pool — "Chemistry is not an exact science."
2. Colour blind
Some things that should be green:
- Soccer fields
- Front yards
And now some things that should not be green:
- Swimming pools
Rio's pool maintenance workers apparently forgot about that rule, and that's why Olympic divers had to jump into water that looked more like lime Jell-O than something a person should be splashing into with minimal clothing.
For the rest of the Olympics, Rio organizers waged a battle with the water at the Maria Lenk Aquatics Centre, sometimes gaining ground, but never truly overcoming their green-tinged menace. And so divers continued to plunge into a pool with colours ranging from an unripe banana to an overcast sky.
It also, apparently, smelled like farts. So there's that.
The Olympic diving pool has been closed again because of water quality issues...a German diver says "the whole building smells like a fart"—@tomsteinfort
1. That Ryan Lochte thing sure escalated quickly
The only plausible explanation I can come up with for this series of events is that Ryan Lochte somehow encountered a genie, and he would only grant Ryan his wish if, when encountered with a problem, Ryan would pick the worst possible option, every time, for three days.
In this case, Ryan did very well, as his choices included:
- Trying to break down a locked restroom door at a gas station
- Urinating on a gas station wall when the above didn't work
- Fighting with a security guard trying to make him to stop
- Lying to his mom and telling her he was robbed
- Lying to Rio cops about being robbed
- Lying to NBC about being robbed
- Blaming his teammates for the incident when security camera footage emerges
The result of which ended up being an international incident, sweeping media coverage, outrage, and a sick new v-neck t-shirt if Lochte got his wish.