Ghosting: Is it ever okay to vanish on someone without explanation?

When it comes to dating, is it ever okay to vanish without a trace? Or should you always let someone know when it's not working for you?

Imagine you have a potential love — someone you're interested in, or actively dating. There's banter and back and forth ... and then one day, it just stops. No response to your texts, emails, phone calls — just a haunting silence. 

Our condolences, you've just been ghosted. 

Ghosting has recently made headlines as a growing cultural phenomenon. In the age of connectivity, it seems, relationships are easy come, easy go. Some say it's fair game to fade away, while others consider it rude or cowardly

So, let's try to call it. For this week's Good or Bad debate, we ask: is Ghosting socially acceptable or not?  Is it ever okay to vanish without a trace? Guest host Rachel Giese checks in with two guests who recently wrote about the subject: 

  • Rachel Thompson says we need to collectively check ourselves and give people more respect. 
  • Alexander Abad-Santos argues that we should just accept ghosting as part of contemporary life.

q: So what do you think? Should you always let someone know when it's not working for you? At what point do you owe someone an explanation? 

Here's some of your feedback, as read by q producers Fabiola Carletti and Julia Pagel on air: 

Earlier this week we asked you to tell us why you ghosted on someone you weren't that into. We read some of your replies on air, but clear your conscience and keep them coming! (CBC)


To encourage thoughtful and respectful conversations, first and last names will appear with each submission to CBC/Radio-Canada's online communities (except in children and youth-oriented communities). Pseudonyms will no longer be permitted.

By submitting a comment, you accept that CBC has the right to reproduce and publish that comment in whole or in part, in any manner CBC chooses. Please note that CBC does not endorse the opinions expressed in comments. Comments on this story are moderated according to our Submission Guidelines. Comments are welcome while open. We reserve the right to close comments at any time.

Become a CBC Member

Join the conversation  Create account

Already have an account?