A John's perspective
"In my own case, I know what I'm doing is wrong. It is cheating. But, it's almost like sex is my own drug problem." - a John contacted by CBC Investigates.
CBC Investigates was able to get in touch with a "John" - a man who has been visiting massage parlours and escorts for 15 years.
Before I get into any of this, I would like to say that i am not proud of the fact that I frequent escorts and massage parlours. When I do go to see them, I go out of my way treat them all with respect, because I know that this is not a career choice that they aspired to. In a lot of my encounters, I have been told that I seem like a decent person, and besides the expected sexual encounter, we usually have some genuine laughs together and some conversation. It may seem odd, but I guess I try and seek some kind of a connection with the women I see.
I do think what you are doing is interesting. More light should be shed on this. Perhaps it will curb some of the activity – which wouldn’t be a bad thing.
There seem to be a lot more women working as Service Providers in the province these days. What changes are you noticing?
When I first started going to massage parlours about 15 years ago, there were no extras offered. You would get the "happy ending" – but that was about it. Then, slowly they offered more in the way of extras. Some places were sketchier than others. I think the worst places were hiring the dancers at some of strip clubs (That's my understanding, anyway). But, the two or three places that would frequent most, often employed local women – who I always found to be amiable and fun to be with. They all had limits of what they would allow, and I always respect peoples boundaries. But, the more you see them, the more trusting they would be to accommodate your needs.
Maybe some guys want to go in and get to it quickly, but I always wanted the full experience. If I'm paying $200 for an hour, I'm not interested in having someone get me off in the first 10 minutes. And that seems to be the way the one's from out of the Province operate. If you don't get your money's worth (you usually pay up front), who are you going to complain to?
The biggest change I have seen is I see more professional women who have day jobs (and decent ones). I’ve seen a teacher, real estate agent, nurse, operating room assistant, actual massage therapy professional, and MUN students. It’s not the under side of society. There are still some women who work as check out clerks and home care workers, but the professionals seem to working as SPs in bigger numbers.
Why do you think there would be more escorts available? The economy? NL getting more cosmopolitan?
I definitely think it's the economy. There's more demand from people who are working offshore, or in Alberta. And there’s more people here on business, and that seems to be reflected in the price they're charging. $300 and $350 an hour seems a bit steep to me, for what you're getting.
How much demand do you think there is right now locally for services like these?
There seems to be a huge demand. There are a lot of married guys – like me – who are going outside to fulfill our fantasies. I guess a lot go to the street walkers, but that doesn’t interest me. I feel bad for those women. I think they are the ones who are really marginalized. And, from what I hear, drugs are a big problem with them. Twice I had someone that I think was on drugs. And I cut the visit short and made sure that it was strictly a hand job and nothing more.
Why do men like yourself...you say you’re married, you’re obviously well-educated...use services like these?
As I already said, a lot of us are going for the thrill of another woman. In my own case, I know what I’m doing is wrong. It is cheating. But, it’s almost like sex is my own drug problem. And when I go to massage parlours I can be myself, and request something different or kinky. I don’t have to hide my sexual preferences, or be ashamed of them. The really good women will make you feel that much more special for the things you can’t admit to your own wife. In my case it’s women’s underwear and stockings. I have had experiences with other guys and still do at times. I don’t know if I’m bi or just open.
You obviously feel some of the local SPs are not as professional as they should be: in your experience, how many live up to their billing, and how many fall short?
Lately, it seems that 75 percent of the SPs that advertise online do not live up to their billing. And it seems to be the ones who aren’t working out of here. They are here for a week or two, and then they’re gone. I don’t feel like they really enjoy what they do (if that’s even possible). They seem to go through the motions as fast as they can, so they can get you out of there.
What are your criteria for a good SP?
My criteria is not that stringent. I like to have a woman who is attractive. She doesn’t have to have the perfect body or prettiest face. I like someone who is real looking. Size doesn’t matter to me, but someone who will be dressed in something sexy is important. And someone who makes me feel special. And I realize they are paid for that. But it is important for her to be comfortable enough to talk and laugh at my attempts at jokes. There’s nothing that puts me off more than someone who doesn’t want to chat. I guess I’m looking for the GFE (girl friend experience).
In a small city like this, how worried are you about the possibility of friends/family finding out you use these services?
I guess it’s always a risk that someone could find out. But I minimize that risk by only going to massage parlours or hotels in the evening. I pretty much know areas where I could possibly see people I know, so those are the places that I would avoid. And before I go anywhere, I always have an excuse as to why I would be in a certain place if i do meet someone I know. But as for seeing someone I know in the same establishment, then I guess we would both have a reason to keep it secret.
Newfoundland's economy is booming. The money is flowing from oil and other megaprojects. It's flowing into big luxury houses, expensive cars, high-end restaurants and stores. And as money will, it's flowing into other industries - those not promoted in glossy tourism ads, but in Not Safe For Work sites on the internet. The province's new economy has created a new workforce - travelling prostitutes. Cities like St. John's have always known prostitution. But in the last 16 months, the boom has exploded.
CBC Investigates set out to find out who's buying - and recruiting - especially recruiting students. Reporter Jen White posing as "Kayla," responded to several ads on NLadultclassifieds, including one from Enchanting Temptations, a female-run Toronto-based escort agency, which recently opened a branch in St. John's. "There will, like any other job, be some getting used to," the agency said in a lengthy email response to "Kayla."