Comedy·THE FUTURE

TECHNOLOGY NIGHTMARE: Self-driving car insists on stopping at Arby's

“We were cruising along just wonderfully, when the car made an unexpected left,” recounts Morlocke, 28.

HALIFAX, NS—Looks like the road to the future may not be as smooth as we all thought.

Samantha Morlocke had a simple request last week for her new self-driving car. She input the address for her dentist's office, and expected to arrive at her appointment with 10 minutes to spare. But as it turned out, her Lexus had other ideas.

"We were cruising along just wonderfully, when the car made an unexpected left," recounts Morlocke, 28.

"At first I thought nothing of it — the car's connected to the internet and it's always updating its maps according to current construction, traffic, and even weather. I just assumed it had a better way to go."

"It did not have a better way to go."

The car went down a road unfamiliar to Morlocke, and approached a red, brown, and grey building with a giant cowboy-hat sign.

"I thought, okay, something's gone wrong here. So I turned off the self-driving function, and took control of the car myself."

"That's when we turned into the drive-thru."

Morlocke attempted to use voice commands to reorient the car, but the vehicle grew suddenly obstinate.

"I said, 'Turn around.' And the car said, 'Arby's.' I said, 'Reverse car, immediately.' Then the car said, 'Horsey sauce, immediately.'"

"Then I figured I should just remind it of the destination and I said 'Dentist's office,' and it said, 'THERE IS NO DENTIST. THERE IS ONLY ARBY'S.'"

At press time, Morlocke was still negotiating with the car, which had now made its way to a combination KFC/Taco Bell.

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