Funny Stuff

Man confirms with 47 coworkers that haircut took place

Jeremy Wong, an employee at 91.5 The Beat, has spent the majority of his day confirming his colleagues’ growing suspicions that he paid for a professional barber to remove a small quantity of his hair at some point over the weekend.

KITCHENER, ON—Jeremy Wong, an employee at 91.5 The Beat, has spent the majority of his day confirming his colleagues' growing suspicions that he paid for a professional barber to remove a small quantity of his hair at some point over the weekend.

"I saw him on Friday and his hair did NOT look like that," explains Grant Mackenzie, who works down the hall from Wong in the ad sales department. "I'm not an idiot. Sometime between then and now, he must have had it cut."

Wong reports that within ten seconds of arriving at work and stepping into the elevator this morning, he found his executive producer staring at him for an uncomfortable length of time with a puzzled expression on his face.

"He told me that something was different. He then asked if I had cut my hair," Wong says. "I had. I had cut my hair."

Wong says he then passed two women from the promos unit who proceeded to gasp when he came into view. "One of them asked if I'd cut my hair, while the more confident one simply stated that I had," Wong recalls. "They spoke at the exact same time. It was a lot for me."

An additional handful of colleagues Wong later encountered in the men's bathroom also demanded answers regarding his changed hair.

"My answer remains the same," Wong explains. "I cut it."

About an hour ago, a young man phoned into the radio station in an attempt to win a contest.

"We spoke about the contest for approximately three minutes," Wong sighs. "And then he asked me if I'd cut my hair."

Wong says he's deeply uncomfortable with the relentless questioning and wishes nobody at his workplace had noticed.

"I deliberately booked the haircut for the weekend so that people at work might have trouble remembering what I look like," he says. "After people haven't seen you for a couple of days I thought maybe they'd forget how I was before."

Mackenzie scoffs loudly at the idea. "I didn't forget," he says. "Nope. No way."

About the Author

Sophie Kohn

Writer/Producer

Sophie Kohn is writer and producer with CBC Comedy, a stand-up comedian in Toronto, and a graduate of Second City's Conservatory program.

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