The Last Black Unicorn
Growing up in one of the poorest neighbourhoods of South Central Los Angeles, Tiffany learned to survive by making people laugh. If she could do that, then her classmates would let her copy their homework, the other foster kids she lived with wouldn't beat her up, and she might even get a boyfriend. Or at least she could make enough money — as the paid school mascot and in-demand Bar Mitzvah hype woman — to get her hair and nails done, so then she might get a boyfriend.
None of that worked (and she's still single), but it allowed Tiffany to imagine a place for herself where she could do something she loved for a living: comedy.
Tiffany can't avoid being funny — it's just who she is, whether she's plotting shocking, jaw-dropping revenge on an ex-boyfriend or learning how to handle her newfound fame despite still having a broke person's mind-set. Finally poised to become a household name, she recounts with heart and humour how she came from nothing and nowhere to achieve her dreams by owning, sharing, and using her pain to heal others. (From Simon & Schuster)
From the book
School was hard for me, for lots of reasons. One was I couldn't read until, like, ninth grade. Also I was a foster kid for most of high school, and when my mom went nuts, I had to live with my grandma. That all sucked.
I got popular in high school, but before that, I wasn't so popular. Kids would tease me all the time in elementary and middle school. They'd say I got flies on me and I smell like onions.
The flies thing came from the moles on my face. I got one under my eye, I had one on my chin, and so on. That was kind of mean.
The onions thing was because my mom used to make eggs in the morning with onions in them. Every damn morning, I had to eat eggs and onions. That would just make you stink. The whole house would stink.
From The Last Black Unicorn by Tiffany Haddish ©2018. Published by Simon & Schuster.