Tonight on the Panel, George talks stats with Allana Harkin, Pay Chen and Ren Bostelaar. Bostelaar is one of the co-creators of the spoof Twitter account @stats_canada, which posts daily updates of completely fake (but utterly real sounding) statistics about Canada. For example:
98% of Canadians are pretending they don't know who Justin Bieber is— Stats Canada (@stats_canada) January 14, 2014
Their conversation got us thinking about the other great spoof Twitter accounts on the Internet. Here, a list of 10 other ones we highly recommend:
Pharrell's Hat (@Pharrellhat)
This is the newest account on the list, started just this week in response to the park ranger hat (or was it a Mountie hat? The Internet can't decide) that Pharrell Williams wore to the Grammys on Sunday. This personified hat dishes out wisdom, aphorisms and even political commentary.
Kim Kierkegaardashian (@KimKierkegaard)
A mashup of reality TV star Kim Kardashian with everyone's favourite Danish existentialist Søren Kierkegaard.
Hermes Birkin bag, hand painted by George Condo. One of one. Christmas present from Yeezy. I carry it around like a sickness of the spirit.— KimKierkegaardashian (@KimKierkegaard) December 27, 2013
Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday)
Two comedian friends imagine what the sitcom Seinfeld would be like today by plotting out episodes that feature problems specific to today. While Jerry himself is ambivalent about the parody, some of the results are pretty spot on.
Jerry’s Twitter's hacked. People like "Hacked Jerry” better. George tries to get trampled on Black Friday so he can sue. Everyone is polite.— Modern Seinfeld (@SeinfeldToday) November 30, 2013
The Dark Lord (@Lord_Voldemort7)
An elaborate online presence for He Who Must Not Be Named (er, Lord Voldemort), the notorious villain in the Harry Potter series. Voldemort takes public jabs at Harry Potter characters, as well as people in the real world.
Daft Punk never take off their helmets because Lord Voldemort is in the back of their heads.— The Dark Lord (@Lord_Voldemort7) January 27, 2014
New York TImes Minus Context (@NYTMinusContext)
This account delivers exactly what it promises: quotations lifted directly from the pages of the New York Times, free of all clutter and context.
toilet paper explains the world— NYT Minus Context (@NYTMinusContext) January 28, 2014
Taylor Swift (@WhatTaylorDoes)
Here we get "the secret life of Taylor Swift," in the form of brief melancholic third-person missives.
On a bright, sunscrubbed morning, it occurs suddenly to Taylor Swift that the problem wasn't trouble walking in — it was trouble walking out— Taylor Swift (@WhatTaylorDoes) December 28, 2013
Not Mark Zuckerberg (@notzuckerberg)
The inner thoughts of Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg — posing, in this fake incarnation, as some kind of Bond villian-like evil genius.
Cute how Amazon thinks there will be airspace left for delivery drones once I blanket the sky with a plague of information-gathering drones.— Not Mark Zuckerberg (@notzuckerberg) December 2, 2013
Mayor Rob Frod (@TOMayorFrod)
A spoof account for Toronto's zaniest mayor, updated so frequently you'd almost believe it was really him.
Not Roger Federer (@PseudoFed)
Besides having a particularly great Twitter handle, this account shares out the fake thoughts of "humble tennis player" Roger Federer.
Courtside tweetings: FYI, I'm not sweating, I'm glowing stardust #humble— Not Roger Federer (@PseudoFed) January 20, 2014
He only follows one person: Justin Bieber. And He tweets His own aphorisms.
Just amended My will. The rich now inherit the earth. The meek will inherit My stamp collection.— God (@TheTweetOfGod) January 28, 2014
And make sure to tune in on January 29 at 7 p.m. on CBC to catch The Panel.