Soccer SuperFans

By: Marvin Penner, Vernon, BC  

After scoring first and ultimately tying Italy, Paraguay should just play Slovakia and New Zealand at the same time and get on with the next round!

Seriously: Does Slovakia have parental permission to go to South Africa? And what about New Zealand? Their symbol is a flightless bird from the lid of old shoe polish (why is it called polish anyway? It's not from Poland after all!) when it could be something cooler that doesn't fly, like a penguin. I think that penguin from the movie Happy Feet would have mad skills in soccer if he watched a few YouTube videos first! The only thing cool about the Kiwis is Lord of the Rings trilogy, but that's old now.

Anyway, back to the game! I was going to go to Commercial St. in Vancouver after Paraguay scored, but I didn't see any other red and white camisetas. I can't fight off all the Azzuri by myself!

I'm back in Vernon now and there is an Italian recreation hockey player at work, but he can't even spell FIFA. Like I said: next round please!!! Suerte Italiano. Maybe we'll be seeing you in the final, but next time our goalie will wear some taller shoes so he can reach that corner kick that went in. I think that Italy was really lucky that Chilavert is too old now. He used to be the toughest goalie in the world. I think he used to take free kicks, score goals and even fight like Tony Esposito.