Behind the Mask

When all is said and done Darren could have chosen to continue down the wrong path, but instead he stopped looked around and changed his course. What a great hockey story but what a fabulous life story, I've known Darren since he as seven and although some of his choices weren't the best it's great to see him back where he belongs, not only in the NHL but with his kids and his loved ones. Life is full of peaks and valleys it takes a great man to climb back up. Peace DMAC

I'm amazed at some of the negative comments being made here. Selfish comments, such as "he is a gambler that doesn't tip" - Shame on YOU! Maybe some day, you will find yourself at the bottom trying to dig yourself out of an addiction of some kind, be it drugs, alcholol or gambling and you will know what it is like. Whether or not you like Darren McCarty as a hockey player, whether or not you like the Detroit RedWings, it doesn't matter - he is a HUMAN BEING, and he is trying to overcome an addiction and get his life back in order. Give the man some respect for his efforts, and stop being so selfish!

Nice little truth you popped in that story - Hrudey. (By the way - you are a "teacher" - although that has never been the title you ended up with.) The truth about being a "father". How you parent is so key to how you BE in this world. Darren seems to be striving for this role to be fulfilled properly and be central to his life. What an excellent goal for him - for me and for you.

I have never met Darren, but did sit with his father Craig once for an hour. What a wonderful man he was. A man who took on his cancer and the many challenges it presented. If I sat with Darren now - I would underline things his dad told me and represented. And, if you think about it, anyone who met my dad and gleaned the rich parts of his wisdom could do a good task by underlining them to me.

Thanks Kelly -- Go Darren Go - in hockey and in the reality of your life.

Addictions are hard to break! The path back to the NHL has been fun to follow in McCarty's case. When I heard he joined up with the Flint Generals, then onto the Griffins, I was saying COME BACK TO WINGS! It may come true, McCarty may play sometime soon in the wings lineup, I can't wait to see the reaction at the Joe.

i hope darren makes it.and he just might.afan but not a detroit fan.

Well I am a Wings fan but whether they win or not is a lot less important than seeing someone like Darren get his life back.

I cannot belive the response of some people, how can you not feel good for someone who is turning there life around. Everybody makes mistakes, at least Darren is trying to fix his and trying to make things better for his family and himself. Just because he is a pro hockey player doesn't mean anything, I would be happy for anyone to overcome what he has.
Good luck and congrats Darren.

This article deserves some defense from critics of both McCarty and Hrudey on this page. One critic implies addicts are not good guys at all when they're using, and that in McCarty's case we should call a spade a spade. We need to distinguish between actions and character. The acts of addicts may often be worthy of critique, but not ALL addicts are bad guys, even when using. Another critic criticizes Hrudey for suggesting McCarty is a 'hero' and for misplacing his praise. This critic is confused about a distinction Hrudey made between what McCarty did in the past and what he is doing now. Hrudey praised only the latter, and without making McCarty out to be a hero. Hrudey saw that what McCarty is doing now is praiseworthy even if his past acts weren't. And accordingly, he gives him an encouraging nod for gathering himself up. This seems innocent and respectable to me, and it seems requisite for forgiveness--a good thing. Sure, overpaid athletes may get too much praise sometimes, but neither should they be denied the praise they deserve simply because they're such athletes.

I have had the priviledge of knowing Darren through his Belleville connections.Every year until recently he gave of his time in the Rick Meagher golf tourney,donated sweaters ect. for auction.I am very happy for him in his recovery. Wes May

Reading the postings on 'McCarty Still Digging', I am still amazed at the cynical comments from some readers.

Too bad more people don't know about positive things like the McCarty Cancer Foundation.

Great column!

Wow ! what's next for the reformed goon ? Order of Canada ???
How about his gambling addiction??

Stick to hockey Hrudey and quit making a hero of such a selfish human being .

Darren did the right thing, in that he gave his life back to himself and his family. It is a difficult task. The tendancy is to keep trucking into self and others destruction. It is never a pretty sight, although, because it is always so damned pathetic and tragic it tends to dredge up a few laughs and rolling eyes. The path to insanity and death is not an easy one to walk, even though it is taken as a lark and people are sickened by watching it. Anytime some man or woman is able to stop that course, get off that path, reverse or change their life in that way, their friends are greatly rewarded, their family is returned a friend, and the world is a better place.

Great story Kelly.

Empathetic reporters who are honestly moved by the pain of others are hard to find.

The comeback of his family and friends will be the tough part of this sad episode.

Happy endings are not guaranteed.

He gambles and doesn't tip. say what you will.

Notice how there is only two negative feedback comments out of the whole bunch about Kelly's story? DN and Jason need a refresher course in empathy. Oh wait a minute, those two are perfect unlike the rest of us, I forgot, my mistake.

There is nothing more satisfying than seeing a person overcome an addiction to drugs, alcohol, or anything for that matter. I have helped youth at my former church, as well as one adult neighbour, to overcome such addictions. Sometimes all they need to know is that someone who isn't part of their circle of family and friends cares about them. Addicts sometimes feel that family and friends are trying to help them because that's what they are supposed to do, but when a person who doesn't know them from a hole in the wall shows concern for them, that's a different thing altogether.

God Bless you Kelly!

Hey Kelly,

Youre great and Im proud you live in alberta. I want you to know that Jason from Vancouver is dead wrong and you are right on the money. Ya users are losers when theyre high, but there is good in everyone, its just a matter of how bad you want that person to succeed in finding that part of themselves again. If you want to help them bad enough, you can make them want to be better bad enough. Someone who works with addicts should know that.

I can't believe the cynicism in some of these comments. I think this is a delightful story about someone who made mistakes, but is working to make it right and to turn his life around. Kelly, great story and don't listen to this "Hockey Fraternity" BS! I've been around people with addictions too, and it's true they are manipulative abusive liars, but the fact that he had the desire and determination to turn it around is amazing.

Great Story...

I hope Darren gets to end his career on his terms, and not his addictions'.

To Jason and DN in Vancouver. Jason, please stop working with addicts. You apparently lack the necessary background and understanding to be working with them. Both of you seem to not understand the fact that a using addict has very bad actions and is fully responsible for them and the damage they cause. Be aware, however, that the actions of an addict in full blown use are symptomatic and not necessarily representative of the user themselves. Being an addict and coming from a long line of addicts, I know a lot of good people who are addicts. DN, no one chooses to be an addict and substance abuse is most often a symptom of the search for something that an individual feel's is lacking in themselves. You call it a sob story if you like but I've seen too much of it to know how wrong you are. Addiction might be the greatest equalizer because it knows no booundaries like class, race, religion. In fact it breaks them down.

Mr. Hrudey,
While I'm more of an old time hockey guy than you, I am also a recovering addict. Regardless of the details, your involvement with any recovery work is commendable and appreciated. Unfortunately for most addicts, they needed attention in their lives long before they ended up using any substances. Keep helping out in any way. You won't see the results of most of your work, but I'll tell you from experience, you are helping more than you know.

We wish the Grinder all the best...great article Kelly. and Flames fans look forward to beating the Wings in the playoff..

as for the few negative comments on the value and connection of this article to family and friends with addiction issues and those of a pro hockey player...

Wake up!

Kelly clearly connects us to the fact that addictions are an issue for all, not just those like Darren McCarthy, who are on their way back...

Flames fans always valued his "go for it" full on effort...the same effort he and all those facing addictions must have...

The thing that blows my mind is that he's sobre... but he still gambles. I work at a Casino where he was a semi-regular while living in Calgary. He played $18 dollars a spin like the rest of the hardcores... so much for rehab. I think until that component of his great deal of issues has been resolved it's going to be a bad buy for Detroit.

What an insidious liar alcohol is. How many lives destroyed or masked from achieving what is there by this carpet bagger. Bruins fan from 70's. Only one Bobby Orr.

As a recovering alcoholic I see the same person, maybe not Darren Maccarty, but the same spirit. He's one of millions just trying to make it through another day. Good on ya' Darren. sleep tight.

I give absolute KUDOS to Darren! As a compulsive gambler who has been in recovery for 4+ years, it's a hard road. The people who support recovery and do not judge are few and far between. Remember people, addiction is a disease that can be arrested but never cured. It's about time that a recovering addict was written about in human terms, not a statistic. Thank you Kelly for not judging a man by his mistakes, but how he works to change his life for the better.

Kelly, don't ever stay away because of the tears! These young people need to see our tears and we need to hear their stories. I lost a son in June 2005 to a cocaine addiction...sad sad time in our lives. But in all my sorrow I also became wiser and stronger. In October 2007 I helped my nephew walk through the doors of rehab. It is a ray of sunlight that brightens my world. I pray others will also find the strength within themselves to reach out for help they so desperately need.

Is there a backstory with you and the AARC? I'm not seeing the connection here.

I wish Darren the best of luck, keep the good fight, fighting... life that is. Getting clean & sober is sure hell. I know of his mistakes & short comings... what I hear & read, but also have played against him. Trying to do the correct thing for himself & family is all anyone can ask. Good Luck D. Not A Red Wing fan, but am a McCarty fan.

Sorry Kelly, can’t quite agree. Usually you’re good seeing both sides of the equations and respect your commentary 90% of the time. But sometimes you grovel too much to the fraternity of hockey and see with rose-colored glasses. I’ve worked with drug users and alcoholics and when they are using, they are not ‘good guys’ at all. They’re abusive, manipulative, liars, selfish and detestable to be around. They go through life leaving a trail of destruction in their wake while others pick up the pieces. Maybe it’s better to let people who’s lives they’ve messed up define what type of person they are rather than a fraternal bystander touting their ‘earnest’ qualities. Sticking together is very important in life, and I definitely agree with your forgiveness and hope for his recovery, but just as important is calling a spade a spade no matter how uncomfortable it feels. Is he being welcomed back to Detroit for ‘finding himself’ or because he can make more money for that business?

I don't see why needing a year to rehab from drug and alcohol addiction makes someone some kind of "hero". This is the part of the current celebrity culture of "rehab-is-cool". Kelly, have you been hanging out with your Hollywood friends too much lately? Darren had problems, and he's hopefully moved on now. He's done the right thing for him. Your adoration is misplaced ... Darren would have done himself a favour in the first place by staying away from drugs and alcohol, especially given that he was fortunate enough to have the genetics, drive and talent to become a well-paid, professional elite athlete.

Having had a child of mine go the AARC route some fourteen years ago now, and having been a parent going thru the AARC process, I can attest to the rigors of addressing an addiction problem, whatever the source of that addiction. AARC was not the nicest place to be for us but it was the only place to be given the severity of our problems. In our case, we were extremely fortunate in that our child had come to the realization that help was needed and graduated from the program within eight months, which may still be close to the AARC record. We now have a beautiful relationship with our child, spouse and grandchildren. Without AARC that may not have been possible. Addiction, we have learned, is not a disease of the rich, poor, weak, strong, male, female, balck, white, yellow or green. It affects all walks of life, including NHL hockey players. I never much cared for McCarty as a Calgary Flame but I admire and support anyone that has gone thru an addiction and come out the other side stronger and better equipped to deal with the daily rigors of life. It is a daily battle to maintain sobriety and it takes guts! There is no-one any more passionate about anything in life than an addict or alcoholic fighting with the daily urge to maintain sobriety. The courage comes from their very soul. I'm in awe of people that can reach down within themselves to find that strength to change their lives in that way. McCarty has had a life changing experience. With god's help, he will become a conduit for others looking to turn their lives around. I hope he is up to the opportunity that he has been presented.

Hey Kelly,

Thanks for putting some positive news forward about a player's struggle and victory. It's good to hear from a former professional player that NHLers are human too. Too many fans take them for granted for their performance on the grid; many times forgetting there were sacrifices made to get to that point in their career/life.

Well done Kelly for extracting one of the most hidden personal stats in professional hockey/sports/society - the battle of addiction - and its flip-side, recovery.

What a heart-warming, positive bit of news that McCarty was signed by the Red Wings this week. But even brighter news that Darren has a new lease on his life - with or without hockey.

Great article, Kelly. That's great to hear that Darren is turning his life around. My thoughts and prayers are with him and his family as he continues his comeback in hockey and in life.

All who know Dr.Vause are very proud of the path he chose and the wonderful work he does. He is a person many of us looked up to growing up in a small city in Sask. It was clear even from a very young age he was a special person. From all reports the work he does is absolutely brilliant and his dedication to the people that need him the most is inspiring to everyone.

Darren, congrats on the 13 months of sobriety.I can only imagine the hard work you have put into it. I myself am a recovering alcoholic/addict. But unlike you I am very young into my recovery(will be a month this sunday if I make it there).Hearing this story really helped he out, for every day is a battle for me. People like you coming out in the open help me to realize that I'm not alone, and for that I thank you again.
Hopefully, with a 12 step program, stories like this, and most of all my Higher Power I will become happy with myself,for I too have three children and a wife that i want to be a father and husband to.
Thank-you again Darren,
Barry.H.

Great comeback story, and pure determination on Darren's part. I'm not a Red Wings fan by any stretch, but it's good to see that they are giving him a chance to get his life back on track.

Way to go Darren!

Very nice story by Hrudey. Glad to see someone speak up about this worthy cause and its importance. Especially like the phrase "when you stop digging".

Well done Kelly!

Technically i have never been a true fan or follower of Darren McCarty but after reading this article on him i too would like to wish him the very best in his comeback into the game of hockey. We all have our little demons, his being the bottle, and to come to terms admitting the problem and set out for help is a huge step. Good for you for taking that step Mr McCarty.

Well done Kelly, I have met Darren on occassion from his days in Belleville with the Bulls , He is a good guy and I too was excited to here that he has be given the chance to resume a career that he loves, Good luck Darren

Kelly,

Of all the sport article I have read in the past months, this is the most worthy of praise. It is without a doubt this inspiring type of story that should front page our sport section. Thank you for shinning the spot light on a true role model for our kids!

Stories such as this are of great importance
and all too often lost in the mass of information published and discussed in Pro Sports.The focus on stats and contracts etc;the business side of hockey, often obscure the human element. It is too easy to forget or ignore that all players have the same daily issues to deal with as the rest of us and their successes and failures extend far beyond the game.

Wow! What a thoughtful article on so many levels. It is great to hear of Darren McCarty's success in dealing with his addiction and his journey back into the game he loves. It is also interesting to hear of Kelly Hrudey's work at AARC - I am sure that the youths he meets there are helped on their painful roads to recovery by his thoughtful presence. I know that I appreciate his comments in this space and on the HNIC broadcasts. Thanks!

Kelly,what a great story! As a police officer for the county of Los Angeles, I see first-hand the affect of what families go through because of addiction problems. This just goes to show us, that "addiction" can play a role in anyone's family, no matter what race or walk of life they come from. To see a person struggle and rebound from their addiction, is a story in its self. To show people how powerful addiction is, there was a player in the NHL by the name of Jere Karalahti who played for the Los Angeles Kings. He was interviewed by ESPN the magazine and during the interview, Mr. Karalahti spoke about his addiction to herion, his love for his wife and daughter and the perks of being an NHL hockey-player. What is so amazing about his interview, was how he could NEVER say that he would NEVER get high again no matter what the out-come had in-store for him. I.E. The chance of lossing his life, faimly and job! This just shows us the power behind addiction..

I'm so pleased to hear that McCarty has his life back. I come from a family that was torn apart by alcohol addiction and I know some of the pain and suffering that is involved.

I'll be cheering for Darren McCarty from this point forward.

Addiction, alcoholism, substance abuse - are mean, dangerous diseases. They infect people -manifesting as chemical dependencies, character weakness, social misfit.

The outcomes, when the disease is untreated, are chronic depression, systemic sadness, suicide to the patient; abuse, poverty, separation to family, friends and society.

But when the patients receive treatment, and take steps to recovery, the outcomes are the ultimate blend of physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health.

Hmmmmmm. Do we need to talk?

great story. thanks kelly for putting a touch of humanity to the sport of hockey. it is easy to point a finger at those who are addicted because most of us do not want to feel the pain. pain that is buried deep inside us. i wish darren and jordan all the best. ordinary people can be role models too.