Friday November 03, 2017
Being single in a small community means your private life is public
more stories from this episode
- 'There's this ambient feeling that something is terribly, terribly awry': How we delegitimize single people
- She isn't looking for someone to 'complete her,' she just wants to share her life with someone
- Desperately seeking solitude: The upside of being alone
- Older, single and ready to mingle: the complicated reality of dating in your sixties
- Being single in a small community means your private life is public
- 'What, oh my gosh, you have herpes too!?': The highs and lows of dating with an STI
- Do you, Tallulah, take yourself to be your lawfully wedded wife?
- 'I love being single and I will continue to be single for the rest of my life'
- Full Episode
Pangnirtung, Nunavut is a fly-in community of about 1,400 people. The community is tight-knit and housing is limited. So when Ryan Oliver's marriage dissolved after seven years, it was hard to go a day without seeing his ex — who had found a new partner — because they still lived in the same house.
Ryan's new found "freedom" ended up being an experience of loneliness. He turned to dating websites, which were liberating when he was on them, but as soon as he logged off he had to face the reality of where he lived.
"I think for most people what a courtship process looks like in a community like Pangnirtung is being around each other all the time and knowing each other from work, knowing each other from community events and attempting to find those moments when you can have a few minutes of privacy."
The reality of dating in a small community like Pangnirtung is that your personal life is public.
"There are very few places to go on a date ... and certainly if you did it would be in front of a good percentage of the entire community. So, you know, in a lot of ways your business is everyone else's business."