Hockey is not all we [hockey] think about

Last Updated: Thursday, February 25, 2010 | 7:36 AM ET

By Brandon Hicks, CBC Sports

Some people have the impression that the only thing we [hockey] Canadians can think about between meals is hockey. (Cameron Spencer/Getty Images)

OK, I have to say something.

I am so sick and tired of the [hockey] worldwide impression that all of us [hockey] Canadians think about is hockey [hockey].

That's absolutely [hockey] ludicrous! I mean, I am carrying a full conversation while our team's playing the Russians [bah] and have not once looked up at [ for Pete's sake, Crosby, shoot the $#%%$#@ puck!!!!] the television to see what's going on.

This is a serious [hockey] misconception! Here we are, hosting the Olympics [good hockey], the international gaze fixed solely on us [hockey] Canadians, and a few still think we're a bunch of beer-swilling [hockey] rednecks who do nothing but [SHOOOOOOOOOOOT!!!!!] talk about hockey [hit the NET next time!!] and hide from polar bears while we're building our igloos.

But we're so much more than [hockey] that! I honestly believe [hockey] we're taking full advantage [power play?] of the opportunity to showcase our nation's heart [hockey], personality and grace [hit him! Hit him! HIT HIM!!!!].

Yet, this [hockey] idea persists that all we think about is [I will HEADBUTT a WALL if they miss another pass!!] hockey.

Just to let you know, there are a [hockey] ton of other great Canadian [hockey] athletes competing at the Games [women's hockey ], and they're doing [hockey] our country proud [get DOWN to block the shot, get DOWN!!!!] while they're competing, and represent our country [hockey] admirably when they're not.

It's as if [hockey] many feel that the only thing we can think [hockey] about between meals [steak] is hockey [hockey], like comparing it [dig it out of the corner!!!] to how much the rest of the [hockey] world thinks about sex [hockey].

Well, we don't think about [hockey] hockey all the time, and I resent the fact that [hockey] this great nation full of [hockey] brilliant individuals is [GREAT stop!!! Louuuuuu!!! LOUUUUUU!!!] pigeonholed this way.

I am going to tell you [hockey] this right now: The success of our [hockey] Olympics doesn't hinge on [hockey] whether or not we win gold in this sport [Oh sweet mother Mary, GetThePuckOutOfTheZone!!!].

In my mind, our home [hockey] Olympics has already been a [TakeItTakeItTakeIt!!!! TURN IT UP-ICE!!!!] smashing success.

The bottom line is, [GO Boyle!! GO!!! GOOOO!!!!] I am shocked and offended that this stereotype [pass it over!! PASS IT!!!!] is even still—[YEAHHHHH!! 1-0!!!! Way to take it to those cosmonauts!!! Ca-Na-DA! Ca-Na-DA!!!!]

...Sorry, lost my train of [hockey] thought.