Four deaths: A rape crisis worker says it's not honour killings, but male violence against women
Tuesday, August 4, 2009 | 11:06 AM ET
Submitted by Fazeela Jiwa
About/Bio: I am a rape crisis line and transition house worker at Vancouver Rape Relief and Women’s Shelter.
My take: Honour Killings? Domestic Violence? Let’s call it what it really is: violence against women.
The debate rages: how do we classify the alleged murders of four female family members by Mohammad Shafia, his wife Tooba Mohammad Yahya, and their son Hamed? Is this crime a tragic case of domestic violence, or can we attribute it to a cultural practice of honour killing? I contend it is neither.
“Domestic violence” should not be used as a euphemism for a phenomenon of violence which is mostly perpetrated by men against women. Undeniably, it is women who fill transition houses and keep rape crisis lines busy across the province. I do not want to be misinterpreted - I am fully aware that men are attacked; they are deserving of help like any victim of violence. As a feminist, I find it highly offensive that when I speak out about violence against women, some people dare to insinuate that I love to hate men. What informs my theory that violence against women is a worldwide phenomenon, not a series of individual acts, are the 120 battered women that we have housed every year since 1973.
There is no need for anyone to racialize these murders by calling them honour killings. Honour killings are simply another manifestation of worldwide oppression of women through violence. Women from a myriad of backgrounds are murdered for a myriad of reasons every day. In Canada, approximately one woman a week is murdered by her male partner - many of these murders also include their children.
It is not only Eastern culture that tolerates the abuse of women; it happens here too. From the perspective of a front-line rape crisis worker, I have witnessed countless women ask for help from Western institutions only to be patronized by being told to “take a walk and calm down”, or even being arrested themselves for being “hysterical” after they have been threatened or raped or beaten. I have worked with women who are told by their Western religious leaders to just wait through their beatings patiently until he asks her for a divorce, because to leave him would defile her in the eyes of the Lord. (What about his behavior in the eyes of the Lord?) There are women who are trafficked to Vancouver from poor countries around the world to be sex slaves to their pimps and procurers, and our precious institutions are talking about legalizing prostitution as a legitimate profession. How can anyone say that Western culture does not tolerate the abuse of women, and other cultures do?
Violence against women is a worldwide problem, not one that rears its ugly head in a few non-Western cultures. It is cowardly to make the issue more palatable by attributing it to one area or race or culture, or by calling it names that obscure the problem and thus delegitimize the solutions - a guaranteed livable income, affordable housing, and transition houses that save women’s lives.
If you are in a violent situation, please call us at 604.872.8212 and we will help you get information, plan your escape, and offer you safe shelter.
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