Justin Bourque told RCMP investigators he wouldn't change a thing about the night in June when he fatally shot three officers and wounded two others in Moncton, N.B.
If he had the power to go back in time, the only thing he would do differently is bring water, Bourque said during his statement to police after being placed under arrest for the killings.
The video statement was played Monday in a Moncton courtroom during Bourque's sentencing hearing, which resumes Tuesday at 9:30 a.m.
"I felt pretty accomplished. I know you think that is pretty sick," Bourque says in the statement.
"It's sad they had a wife and kids, but every soldier has a wife and kid."
Police officers and soldiers are "all in the same basket," he says.
The victims may have been good men, but they chose to "fight for the Crown," Bourque says.
"I would have probably taken more down and kept going from there," he says.
"I'm not a bad guy, I'm just a cop killer."
"Everybody who's ever fought for freedom's killed somebody."
The approximately 3½-hour statement gives the first glimpse of what was going through Bourque's mind at the time of the shootings on June 4.
He talks about using marijuana and how he was feeling depressed.
"I was expecting to die, but somehow I got the mentality to be a soldier. But I never found my war," Bourque tells RCMP.
He says he "feels kind of good," but isn't looking forward to imprisonment. "Though I kind of expected that and prepared mentally."
He also complains about his arrest by members of the SWAT team. "Honestly, I feel mad at those officers," he says.
"I know I killed people, but isn't that more humane than people who grabbed me by my neck and stepped on my balls?" he asks, adding later that he also chipped a tooth.
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Const. Doug Larche, Const. Dave Ross and Const. Fabrice Gevaudan were all fatally shot by Bourque.
Const. Darlene Goguen and Const. Éric Stéphane J. Dubois were wounded.
Bourque tells RCMP he wasn't familiar with the wooded area where he eluded a police manhunt for more than 24 hours after the killings.
"It was where the road took me, I guess," he says.
Bourque said he had some cheese sandwiches, Ritz crackers and two granola bars with him during the manhunt. He drank water from a hose.
"I was thinking about not getting caught," Bourque says. "Cover and conceal."
Bourque appeared calm and relaxed as he gave his statement to RCMP at the Sackville detachment, sitting loosely in a chair, wearing jail-issue blue shirt and pants, his blue-slippered feet flat on the floor.
After telling the investigator about a home-schooled upbringing in a strict Catholic household and describing himself as agnostic, Bourque is asked if he has good morals. He replies, "I think so."
'I always think that I had a pretty good moral compass.' —Justin Bourque
"I always think that I had a pretty good moral compass."
Bourque is then asked what caused things to happen.
"A lot has to do with ignorance and socialism," Bourque replies.
"There's been a need for an uprise for a long time," he says.
"Everybody has the freedom to do the same thing that I did."
Asked when that train of thought started, Bourque replies when he was 16, listening to heavy metal music.
Bourque, who says at one point he "feels like s--t" and hasn't slept in two days, rambles at times early in the interview. He talks about caged human beings, the rule of tyrants, living behind the black curtain, the suicide rate in Moncton, unfairness in society, self-righteous rich people, hook-in-mouth syndrome and a lack of personal freedom in Canada.
His initial plan was to set some gas stations on fire, but his bicycle was broken so he "winged it," he says.
A friend drove him to Better Buy Sports, where he purchased three boxes of .308-calibre ammunition and shotgun shells, the courtroom heard.
He never indicates that anybody else knew about his plan or took part.
Bourque tells police he "lived like a snake" for a couple of days before being arrested.
He describes seeing a police officer who had his gun half-ready, "but not ready enough." He recounts without emotion "tagging" an officer, then checking to make sure he was dead.
Bourque estimates firing about 18 rounds. He had about 80 in total, he says.
"I'm not a bad sniper," Bourque says, suggesting he picked up his tactical skills from playing video games.
His other "talents" include being able to imitate cartoon voices, and being athletic, he says.
Bourque says he was surprised by what he described as a lack of resistance from police. "None of them stepped foot in the woods," he says.
10 victim impact statements
As those in the packed courtroom watched the video, some of the relatives of the victims and other RCMP officers shook their heads.
Bourque stared straight ahead from the prisoner's box most of the day.
Earlier Monday, the sentencing hearing heard 10 victim impact statements and a detailed timeline of events from the night of June 4, when Bourque shot and killed three RCMP officers and wounded two others.
Bourque subsequently pleaded guilty to three counts of first-degree murder and two counts of attempted murder.
The Crown is seeking three consecutive life terms, which would leave Bourque not eligible for parole for 75 years. That would be the longest prison sentence in Canadian history.
Although defence counsel David Lutz has yet to present his arguments on sentencing, Crown prosecutor Cameron Gunn indicated in his opening remarks Monday that the defence would be seeking a reduction of 25 to 50 years in exchange for Bourque pleading guilty.
Bourque's statement was given to RCMP in Sackville, where he was incarcerated after his arrest.
Asked in the video if he had been treated fairly, Bourque says he was, but complains of treatment at the hands of the SWAT team when he was arrested.
"I was tortured for 10 minutes before getting in the cop car," he said. "Once in the cop car, they treated me good."
Bourque says he grew up in a strict Catholic family with five sisters and a brother and was home schooled. He says he spent his time growing up working and playing video games.
"My mother is absolutely dogmatic into religion," said Bourque. "My father is more relaxed."
Bourque said he left his parents' home to "develop a free mind."