It doesn't happen often, but we did see a fairly rare instance of someone being removed from a city council meeting on Monday.

One of the regular city hall watchers decided to use the five minutes any presenter is given to speak for or against a land-use matter.

But in less than three minutes, it went horribly wrong as she decided to stray far — far — off topic and be less than courteous.

Short of producing a weapon or attacking someone, here are three things you can do to ensure your ejection from a public meeting.

1) Don't speak to the matter at hand, even when asked to focus.

On Monday, this citizen was given fairly free reign to speak on a variety of subjects that had nothing to do with the item she was there to oppose. This went on for about 90 seconds.

2) Argue with the mayor (or if in committee, with the chair).

When reminded to focus, the citizen chose instead to argue and talk over the mayor. Repeatedly. She was basically yelling. There was another 15 seconds of this.

3) Insult people and don't stop.

The citizen then says to Ald. John Mar: "Yes, you can do your face Mar. You haven't got a clue what you're talking about. You're a little tiny boy!" 

This produced the warning from Nenshi that if this continues, security will be called. She continues off topic.

Then she maligns top city administrators. This results in another warning which then leads to her questioning the mayor's integrity.

Nenshi lowers the boom and calls in security to remove her. 

Elapsed time: 45 more seconds. 

No one on council raises a word of protest against the mayor's decision.

If you manage to go through all three no-no's, security will be called in. 

And when that happens, you can argue like an athlete debating a referee's penalty call, but the penalty has been called and you're leaving — end of story.

And if you refuse to go, the police will be called to remove you.