By complaining, you better not go back to the said restaurant as the server will remember you and who knows what will be put on your food. She might not be your server again but definitely she will tell her fellow servers about you and your complaint.

I'm curious, in the end, did either you or your husband complain to the manager about the service? Sounds like maybe not.

If your server had acted like this in the US, she'd be eaten alive on the spot. You'll also notice that down south, they're more willing to serve you.

The simple solution is the transition to a form of compensation for servers that is more heavily based on tips rather than an hourly wage. In the United States, servers are paid a very meager hourly wage and have to rely on good service to earn good tips. On the other side of the pond, everyone gets a much higher hourly wage and the service is absolutely terrible unless you go into an American chain because an American would hold the local Pizza Hut accountable for the service they received in Munich. In Canada, as you often do, you find yourself between these two extremes, but the solution is simple: Incentives get people to do their jobs.

The reason I've stopped complaining about bad service is that there is no one supervising anything, to complain to. Supermarkets, drug stores, restaurants, utility companies, you name it, are staffed with people who aren't paid enough to care. When you ask for a supervisor, there is no one on shift. If you phone, you get put into black hole loop of voice messages.
I have no time to complain anymore.

I have worked in the service industry and it is entirely based on one thing and one thing only-SERVICE with a capital S !! I have been in restaurants where they demand a tip, even though the food is borderline, the service is poor or non existent and the server staff act as though you owe them a living. I do not mind for one second giving a tip IF- the food is half decent, the service is good, and the staff helpful and friendly. One restaurant I have frequented seldom has small items like sugar, salt, ketchup, spoons, napkins and the like on the tables. You wait 10-15 minutes sometimes to get a coffee while waitresses are outside having a smoke, chatting up the cooks or other customers or generally just wasting your time. I rarely leave a tip. If a server gives me quick, efficient friendly service they will get a tip, if they don't they will get nothing from me, cetainly not my hard earned money. I work for my money, I expect them to do the same. Go to McDonalds and you will get food that is consistent in taste and quality, quick service, friendly staff and reasonable prices. If I order a Big Mac in Moscow I will get the same thing in Ottawa. Enuf said!!

I have lived in Belgium for some time, and would like to dispell some myths about bad service in European restaurants. North Americans have grown up assuming greed is the only available tool for promoting excellence in unskilled labour. So Canadian dining room managers hire staff assuming all they are capable of is carrying plates and making change, and leave them at the mercy of the clientele. There are places here where the staff are unfriendly, even boorish, but not in larger proportion than in Canada. Many more places are family operations and it shows. Most importantly, waiting on tables is seen as to be as legitimate as any other job and many managers seek to make the most of the high cost of labour by training them properly.The average Flemish waitress knows what's on the menu and what beer goes best with waterzooi. Good service or no tip? I have never tipped a flight attendant nor trainman but have usually received good service on airlines and trains (Canada and Europe).

Making complaints does not work in Canada, because there is no culture of taking and accepting any critique. Customer services reps take words of dissatisfaction, let alone a complaint, personally. It may be, in part, due to disconnect between the idea that businesses provide SERVICE and the idea that personnel SERVE customers.
The lack of skills and professional attitude in SERVING customers, who are not angels yet they pay, is visible among Canadians.

While I agree with L.Downey's comment: "you are in effect their employer during your visit", I would like someone to tell the server.

I also have to agree with J.McPherson's comment: "I do not mind for one second giving a tip IF- the food is half decent, the service is good, and the staff helpful and friendly". A combination of all these three ingredients would need to be delivered in good quality before I would consider a tip. You must realize that a percentage of the tips you give is usually reserved for the kitchen staff as well.

Also, simply because I dine at a 4-star hotel and pay 4-star price shouldn't automatically qualify you to receive a fat tip. Those three ingredients still need to be present so stop adding tips to my bill unless I authorize you to do so!

I have reduced my frequency in dining in restaurants simply because of the whole 'tipping' fiasco. There's too much expectation out there by servers (of every type) to get a tip regardless of quality of service. And guess what, 10% tips based on total of the bill is more than sufficient. Most of us don't get 10% 'tips' for doing our job! Nuff said!

Complaining does work. I've been a squeaky wheel all my life. On the other hand, when I get excellent service I also compliment.

No, I'm sorry, you have it wrong.

Yes, you should complain (politely) in the circumstanses you've described, and obtain satisfaction that a correction will be made. The treatment you received is unacceptable and it is not in the best interest of the business in question to allow it.

However, this is not the American way. Americans are rude arbitrally with the vague notion that it gives them some kind of strategic upper hand. That's not at all the same thing.

I find it similar to people who tail-gate in heavy traffic... there is NOTHING to be gained by advancing to tail-gate the next car in front of you. Those dimwits don't seem to understand that after their dangerous rude maneuvering... they are NOT going any faster than they were a second ago.

Standing up for your right to proper and polite treatment is not at all equivallent to
an excuse to become rude and strident. I hope you can appreciate the distinction.

Of course, many Americans are deeply polite and to be admired and emulated. However I must strenously object to your charaterisation that the alternative to Canadian wimpyness is to be American.

Jacqueline Drew sounds like the kind of person who drops a load of crap on the least paid employees in the country. Why do people like this want to badger the least protected workers.

What is so wrong about passive complaints. Undeserving businesses shouldn't get second chances. What is wrong with the service industry that it can't learn without the loudmouth approach in the company of other patrons?

When I sit down to dinner, I don't want to hear every boorish whiner giving a server Heck.

If you must complain, be polite about it. If the food is bad, quietly tell the server to pass on the information to the managers. Don't forget though, their employer will probably fire them for passing it on.

I would not say the American way is so bloody good. Do you hear the rest of the world saying "I heart America".

I read recently that upon receiving bad goods or service an American will holler at the top of his lungs and then give repeat business, whereas a Canadian will say nothing, never return, and tell everyone who will listen just how bad the business was.

As for tipping, I married a Kiwi last year, and she is still trying to get the hang of tips. Outside of the tourist traps in New Zealand tipping is nearly non-existent. Service rendered for face value, no "hidden charges".

Time to re-start the debate of giving wait staff a living wage, so that tips really do become gratuities, rather than an expectation?

I'm wondering if any of the people who have commented here have been, or are, servers themselves. I used to be a server and can rightfully say that the work is hard, long and quite unrewarding. Most customers are rude themselves because of attitudes like Mr. Gerald Rempel exhibited in his comment "if I order a hamburger,french fries and a bottomless ice tea for $8, or I order a newyork,rye & coke and a salad for $27 why am I expected to pay that 15 or 20% on the extra $19...there was no more work involved for server or cook,hmmm."

Actually, there IS more work to cook a new york, to make a rye & coke and to put together a salad. It upsets me that some people make comments without even trying to find out the reality of a server's work experience and what they have to put in, and how little they get back.

However, I also agree that paying 15 or 20% gratuity can be excessive, and that if the service industry does not pay a worker enough to live on, that's not the public's fault. This is not a club, and we are not trying to bribe the doorman to get us into the VIP area. We are entitled to an enjoyable experience at a restaurant no matter what we're willing to tip. If servers are unhappy with the amount of money they make, there is a simple solution: get another job.

Finally, when it comes to complaining - I have definitely seen first hand situations where a customer complains about a server, and the next time they frequent the restaurant, their food gets spit on, or their food is deliberately overcooked, or you name it. So I don't blame many Canadians for simply refusing to re-visit an establishment once they've had a negative experience there. Some servers can be as vicious as some high-profile prosecutors, and will go to extreme lengths to get what they want, whether it's a good tip or revenge.

Americans are overworked and underpaid...they need a scapegoat for their frustration and its usu. the guy/gal who can't fight back because they have something to lose...and they wonder why they have so many rampage shootings

To assume the servers have no sense of integrity and band together defecating food and beverages over a complaint, speaks volume of your upbringing and background. Obviously, education and a better opportunity in Canada is no recipe for character building.