Costly toys

When Toronto mom Judi Rotman thinks about Christmas she becomes light-headed. It's not visions of sugar plums dizzying her, though — it's the cost of the presents on her kids' Christmas lists.

"Zara, 10, wants Nintendo DS [a handheld game console] which costs $160 before tax, then the games, between $40 and $60. And you can't just give them that. My son Esten, 12, wants a bike. He has a BMX helmet so he wants the BMX bike. How do you give your kid a bike and say 'This is it'? No stocking stuffers, this is it."

Rotman isn't the only parent reeling from pricey requests from teen and preteen children these days.

"Over the last five years, we've found parents are more frustrated," Canadian Toy Testing Council executive director Leigh Poirier says. "Their kids want some of the traditional-type toys, but also the high-tech products, which can be quite expensive. We're seeing parents spend anywhere between $50 to more than $1,000 on each child."

Poirier explains, "There's more advertising in the marketplace now — TV, newspaper and the internet. Our kids' generation is high-tech savvy. They're born into it. Even infants' toys have the high-tech component developed into it. As they get older, they want more sophisticated products like MP3 players, iPods and laptops — which is quite standard now at eight or nine years old."

For example, a quick glance at the Best Buy website shows the Sony PlayStation 3 ($659.99) and the Nintendo Wii ($279) for sale along with the Apple 30 GB iPod Movie ($299). Laptops usually begin at $699. Add tax and accessories to any of these items, along with a couple of other presents and stocking stuffers, and it's no wonder parents are stressed.

It doesn't get any cheaper if your child is an athlete. Suiting up a child in the latest skiing or snowboarding gear can also be pricey. Snowboarding company sales manager Eden Frieberg says, "For a kid's snowboard package [board, boots and binding] the entry level would be $300, up to the high-end product at $1,200. Then there's clothing, hats, goggles. You're looking easily to $1,500 to $1,800."

Expectations have definitely changed since the baby boom was penning its Christmas wish list. Rotman remembers, "I never would have asked my parents for these big-ticket items. But their friends get pricey items. Last year my son's friend got the new Xbox 360, which costs several hundred dollars."

"Our generation started out affluent, and that's why our children have a lot of this stuff, but to try to keep up year after year, that's difficult," Poirier says. "What child doesn't have some of this high-tech gadgetry and electronics?"

So what's a parent to do?

"I usually speak with my kids about the price of it after," Rotman says. "Last year my son opened up his presents, then said, 'Is this it?' We sat there and calculated how much it added up to. They have no idea until you do that. If you could just tell them they're getting one big thing that would be fine. But then to fill their stockings and give them other presents is very difficult." Child psychiatrist Dr. Sandra Fisman says part of the solution involves parents setting realistic expectations, and not just during the holidays.

"In terms of raising children and having a value system that will allow you to raise children who appreciate what they get, I think the world has become out of control," she says. "If children get everything right up front, there's nothing to strive for."

The key is sticking to your family's values, Poirier says. "That's why we promote educating kids at a young age about the different types of products out there and letting them know they don't need to have everything within the marketplace. It's best to have your kids set a price range within your limit. If they want an iPod, maybe tell them it's the only gift they'll get."

She also advises not setting a precedent for pricey high-tech gifts when children are at a young age. "Once you do, they get used to them and want them replaced. Because they change quite drastically, kids want the latest and greatest. Also, because many of these products are small, they are much more likely to be lost or stolen. Less-expensive games and arts and crafts are appreciated."

Still, Poirier is realistic. "I think a lot of people are just going out and buying the presents when they really can't afford it."