New Advances In Space-Time Physics, or Trying to make sense of 90210
- September 10, 2008 12:24 PM |
- By Arts Online
Illustration by Jillian Tamaki
Forget the possible end of the world that could occur because of the big physics experiment going on in Switzerland: there's another rift in the time-space continuum that threatens us all. The problem is the new 90210 show, which is breaking the laws of physics in the Spelling-verse.
There was a good deal of crossover between the original Beverly Hills 90210 and its spinoff Melrose Place; Grant Show's brooding loner Jake Hanson, for example, dated Beverly Hills student Jennie Garth's character Kelly Taylor. In the new 90210, Garth reprises her role as Kelly, now a guidance counsellor at West Beverly High. Old-school 90210 alums Shannen Doherty (Brenda) and Joe E. Tata (affable Peach Pit proprietor Nat) also appear. So it's clearly established that all three shows exist within the same universe and should be subject to the same laws of continuity.
The issue is actor Rob Estes, who plays Harry Wilson, the principal of West Beverly High, on the new show. Estes also played restaurant owner Kyle McBride on Melrose Place. Wha…?
Wait a minute, how can one actor play different characters on two shows that exist in the same continuum? Surely some viewers have tuned into 90210 and thought, "Hey, there's that dude from Melrose," only to discover that he is in fact a completely different person. Since the rules of physics state that no person or thing can be in two places at the same time -- and by extension, no person can be two people at the same time -- this displacement will inevitably cause reality to unravel.
Unless, of course, in true Spelling fashion, it's revealed that Wilson is indeed McBride, perhaps sporting a new identity because he's on the run from the mob. Or perhaps Wilson is actually McBride's twin brother who lost his memory after a stint with the military in Iraq. Or Wilson has been cloned from the remaining DNA of McBride, who was actually in the car explosion that supposedly killed Dylan's father but really didn't.
Whatever the case, the writers need to get on top of this conundrum. The very fate of reality depends on it.
-- Peter Nowak
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