If the United States ever invades Canada, let's hope Randy Pike is in charge.
The public affairs chief with the U.S. Army managed to lose $8,000 US in 1½ minutes trying to win in the "Canadian cities" category on the TV game show Jeopardy
YouTube video of Monday's episode shows the category was entirely avoided by all three contestants until the end of the Double Jeopardy round.
And you can see why.
All the clues given by host Alex Trebek failed to spark a single inspired response.
No one tried to answer the category's first clue: "An intersection in this provincial capital is the original western terminus of the Trans-Canada Highway."
"Near the end of the country," Trebek hinted as he gave the correct answer, "Victoria, British Columbia"
The biggest loss came when Trebek provided the Double Jeopardy clue: "The swan is a symbol of this Ontario city. Each year, white and black swans are released into the Avon River."
Pike responded with "What is Edmonton?"
The incorrect answer cost him his $5,400 wager and earned him a gentle chiding from Ontario-born Trebek.
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"Oh no, what is Stratford. You had to think," corrected Trebek. "Avon River … Shakespeare."
But it was the last clue that prompted the funniest answer from the panel.
"Residents of this Saskatchewan city are called Moose Javians," said Trebek.
"What is Winnipeg?" Pike offered, causing Trebek's face to break into a giant grin.
Pike eventually dropped to minus $2,600, forcing him out of the Final Jeopardy round
Despite his lack of knowledge in Canadian geography, at least he gave it a try.
Neither of his rivals, California's Victoria Machado nor returning champion Dan Feitel, bothered to hit their buzzers at all.
"This Alberta resort was the first municipality to be incorporated within a Canadian national park."
"What is Whistler?" answered Pike. "What is Banff?" corrected Trebek.
"In 1992 this city's velodrome, once used in the Olympic games, was transformed into a environmental biodome."
"That city was Montreal," Trebek revealed after no one buzzed in.