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Valentine's Week

Tina Fey on roller skates: Best date ever

What would you do on a date with your favourite comedy writer? We asked comedian Debra DiGiovanni (who'll be judging our Valentine's Day Twitter Challenge) that very question, and the results are... well, maybe not as deeply romantic as we'd hoped. 

David Sedaris 
"I think it would be intimidating, because he’s funny and smart, whereas I usually like to go for dumb and dumb. As for what we do on the date, it would have to be romantic but adventurous. Like a hot air balloon ride. Is it sad that I find hot air balloons adventurous? He would scare me a little bit. If I didn’t make it to first base I’d be heartbroken. And for David Sedaris, I think that first base would qualify as him reading aloud to me. Me reading to him is second base."

tina-deb.jpgTina Fey 
"This is the real dream date. This would be the one that I’d diet for, and I'd go get my hair done. She’d be like dating the quarterback in high school. I’d write home, and everyone would be super jealous. I’d take tons of selfies with her. We’d just sit somewhere and people-watch and mock. Or wait, could we do that while roller skating? I’d just like to hear her thoughts. She could read me the phone book and I’d be excited about that. She’s the woman you’d bring home to your parents. I’d be writing 'Debra DiGiovanni Fey' in my diary for days! And 'Tina' with a heart on the 'i.'"

Rick Mercer
"He and I would probably go dancing, but we’d both take a long nap first, and we’d wear really comfortable shoes. And we’d do just a little bit of dancing. I’m thinking he’s probably not a great dancer, and neither am I so it would be perfect! Then we'd go for a snack, like street dogs. And then maybe we’d go fight for a cause and make sure people’s human rights aren’t being violated. It would be a reasonable night. Because we’re both of a certain age. We’d get home in time to have a good night’s sleep."

The late Nora Ephron 
"Oh, what a brilliant woman she was. Now that one would be a wonderful ladies’ night. We’d definitely go to a spa and we would dish. And we'd share some sort of decadent baked things. Some dainties. She would pay, of course. I’d want to know all about her past Valentine’s dates because she’d have some great stories. I think her Valentine's Day stories would have probably been three screenplays right there." 

Judd Apatow 
"We could have a good chat session. I think he’s the most classic date of all of these. I don’t think there’d be sexual tension. I wouldn’t dress up for this one, you know? I think we’d just have a real casual best-buds easy relationship. He and I would probably go to a comedy club. He’d be fun to go with, because we could commiserate and share what we think is funny. We would heckle to each other quietly. Maybe writing notes, rolling eyes. I’m assuming he’s wearing a button-up and sneakers, and so am I. The only thing that would be bad—in fact my worst fear about the date—is that we show up wearing the same shirt."


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